Ode To My Lap Band

6 years ago today I got the Lap Band. After years of suffering with co-morbidities I was finally seeing a light at the end of the tunnel. I would finally be able to lose weight with the help of this device. This safe device that was 100% reversible. This device that would be able to let me live "normally" after suffering and fighting for, at that time, 10 years.

For years I was told that I was obese because I was lazy and made poor eating choices. That if I just ate right and exercised then I would lose the weight. It was just that simple.

I was so young and clueless. I believed everything these "educated" people were telling me. It was breaking me down. It tore up my self esteem. It was my fault, starting at age 10, that I was fat. This young adolescent who always made good choices in everything she did was failing at something; my health. My self esteem was slowly being destroyed. Here I was, this girl who was active in sports, who danced recreationally and competitively, who worked hard to have high academic performance and took college courses in high school was obese because of the poor choices she was supposedly making. It didn't make sense but they were educated so it had to be true.

My mom saw what was going on behind closed doors. She fought and FOUGHT for my pediatrician to have my thyroid tested because hypothyroidism ran in the family. It was genetic. The doctor refused over and over again. She told my mother over and over that it was her fault (and mine) that I was obese. If I could just get active and eat better then everything would change.

Nothing was changing.

She finally tested me.

On my 16th birthday my mother called me to tell me the news; I had hypothyroidism and that was the reason for my current issues. The transparent skin, the thinning hair, the need to sleep excessively, the OBESITY were all due to my thyroid not functioning well. It was genetic and not my fault but at that point my self esteem was already shot. I hated what I saw in the mirror.

My mom dumped that pediatrician instantly. When she read her the results she laughed in her face and said, "HA! I told you! " along with a few other choice words. Mama Bear came out that day. She then turned around, found a new family physician and got a referral to the best endocrinologist in the state.

He ran many tests.

We had answers. I finally had answers.

I had hypothyroidism. Because it went undiagnosed for so long I also had pre-diabetes and Dysmetabolic Syndrome. He suggested looking into weight loss surgery but because I was 16 I still had fight left in me. I was going to be treated which meant that there was a chance to lose weight and be normal.

I was right but over the course of 4 more years I yo-yoed my weight loss despite my efforts. At age 20 I had the lap band placed.

I don't regret it at all.

I was finally able to lose weight. I reversed that pre-diabetes, reversed/resolved my dysmetabolic syndrome and my thyroid was easier to manage. I was incredibly happy.

The lap band taught me to make some permanent life changes. I nixed wheat from my diet. It motivated me to spend extra time researching various healthy lifestyles, read studies on hypothyroidism, and to ultimately dive deeper into what it means to be healthy. Living with the lap band taught me an incredible amount of what it means to live healthy for ME.

I eventually learned to love my body. I forgave the professionals who broke my self esteem down. I learned that I'm not selfish to put my health first.

I'm 26 now. I'm happy, healthy, living my dream and I couldn't be happier.

As for the Lap Band, yes, I am getting a revision. That story is for another day; another explanation. I don't regret the lap band at all so take my experience with a grain of salt. I'm not a medical professional but I'm my own advocate which means I've come to the decision that I must continue with a WLS to lose weight but not with my Lap Band.

I wish you nothing but happiness on your journey to health. Despite how hard your fight may be please remember to never give up. You've got this!

Credits:

I would like to thank Dr. Nelson and the staff at Journey Clinic for forever changing my life. Also a special thanks to Dr. Bakhta and Dr. Gude for the quality care over the years. It is because of you that I am the healthy individual that is living life today!

Stats pre-pregnancy:

HW-210

LW-169

Picture below is of me at my lowest weight.